Summer of '10

My car started with Grrrhh... Grrrhhh.. It was a very polite way of it saying - 'Dude, I F@#$%^& need a service'.. So, at midnight (8AM, Sunday morning), I started to Ikatutangal Hyundai Motor Plaza (Sorry to my north indian friends, u need training to pronounce these names).. I had my A/C on and moving into top gear when I saw a bout of red liquid flying past my wind pane.. I was dumbstruck seeking for the worst - a deadly accident. Alas, I was wrong.. it was our bald marwari who spat his pan and smiling with his ugly tainted tooth with pride on his face. Using few holy words, I moved on.. I reached HMP with no further qualms and gave my car for service.. The technician greeted me with a pleasant face and wrote down the pampering the car requires - Approximate bill - Rs. 3,000. Wonderful, I thought.. Now is the time to save the money.. So I reached for the bus stand - ready to board a bus after nearly a decade.. I heard about the newly bought buses and its 'Deluxe' seatings... I got in triumphantly and next 30 minutes was heaven..

Mr.Conductor asked me for ticket ticket - I gave him the 100rs note.. He said ' Change illaya..?'. When I provided a meek no, he was cursing the IT companies for the bloody money power and rising prices! I was to protest the way we work as bonded labors in an A/C environment... but trailed off looking at his big menacing mustache.... Next was the uncle near me.. He reminded me of the foreigners who used to come to Chennai with minimal clothes.. Except that he presented a sweet aroma from his arm pits due to heavy perspiration.. Damn, I cursed the Chennai summer and dug my nose into my heavily scented shirt.. I moved on when suddenly a woman tapped on my shoulder and gave me money - However badly I needed it, I said 'No its ok, I have taken the ticket' when she gave a snarl and told me to pass on saying 'Two tickets, Beach'. Damn, another embarrassment..

I reached half way through the journey with no further qualms when the bus suddenly stopped in Guindy. It stood for an eternity and the hot sun was sapping my already diminishing patience and energy. To add to the woes was the conductor piling in more people on the already full bus. I was pushed, turned, kicked, stamped and bulldozed literally all the over the bus and was close to tears. Suddenly God answered my prayers for a seat and a lady got up and I sprang into the seat, just like a kid would jump for a candy when his mom was not around. I gasped for breath, recollected my senses and turned to face the horrific face I have ever met in my life. She was as large as the bus, occupying two tickets for one and with ruthless tone told me 'You don't see whats written there', pointing to whats written on the bus. Unfortunately, my literature in tamil isn't great and it turned out to be the ladies seat! Damn.. 33% even here........!! Finally, I reached my destination and got off to find that there was no auto. I cursed myself for coming by bus and walked all the way home.

I came home in tatters, frustrated for my unusual intention to save the extra buck and reached for the A/C only to realize that there was a power cut!!

Butter and Jam - Traffic Jam!

The maddening traffic in Chennai has made me start blogging. Thank you 'Singara' Chennai.

My day of travel on the road starts with adding on to the list of 'acquaintances' in my life, that has been on a steep rise. The blissful words that is exchanged is of highest quality and doesn't involve the individuals alone, but also the entire family members and future generation.

Then comes the bliss of watching two wheelers, zoom their way past the traffic and make a mark of their presence on my car. Moreover, its a real treat, especially when your in a hurry, to watch two of them on either ends of the road and speak to each other, with no room for the car to pass in between. I must add that 4 wheelers are equally co-operative and occupy the complete road.

With the government in a mood to construct fly overs to add on to their already bulging bank accounts, is another cause to rejoice for commuters like me. It would be crude to miss our law makers, the traffic police, who don't wear their helmet and come on the wrong side creating a havoc. Of course, they are beyond rules you see..!! And yes, not to forget the pedestrians who are highly motivated to cross only when a vehicle is 1metre ahead of them and challenge the driver to hit them. I almost forgot our newly designed aeroplanes that fly on the road, also branded as 'autos'. They are free to move from left to right, up to down and also to land his plane in the middle of the road, and bargain with his customer about how high the fuel prices are and his 'tender' heart of charging nominal rates!!

Chennai's strength is equality and we don't mind cows, dogs, deers and donkeys crossing/sleeping on the already 'wide' roads! To top it all, driving license has been given to color blind commuters too, who due to their inability, honk even when the signal is red! Chennai roads are a testimony to how life is all about - UP & DOWN! Kudos to our government's attitude towards teaching a lesson to the voters! Wish they could also give lessons that pot holes are not wash basins to spit and lane driving isn't that bad after all.

After such an eventful journey, I reach my office, only to find that I have forgotten my ID Card - Could anyone help me get it, PLEASE!!!???